It's
a simple fact: sex changes as we age. When we're
young we have tons of energy but no experience.
Once we're older we gain that experience, but trade
off the 'rabbit response' (well some of us do).
But there's a lot more to it than just that.
Many
things affect us as we age, both physical and psychological.
Hormonal changes can alter our levels
of sexual desire over various stages of life. Testosterone
production can decrease with various health conditions
as well as being the side effect of many heart
and blood pressure medications. In these cases
it's not
the age that matters, but the hormone testosterone
that needs to be replenished. Replace the testosterone,
and many men see reinforced sex drive and penile
performance.
Your
energy levels also change over time. When you are
a teenager with 'raging hormones' you experience
sex at different energy levels than what you experience
in your mid fifties. Although the style of sex may
change, as well it probably should if just for safety
reasons, the quality can even increase as we better
learn our bodies' responses (and those of our partners).
Not
only do our bodies change over time, but a lifetime
of experiences can change what sex means to us over
time, and at various stages in our lives. It's natural
to feel changes to how we view sex, and what we get
out of it. But while some things change, others remain
steady. Our family and friends, who helped mould
us as we grew, helped seed many values and beliefs
that we carry through adulthood into our elder years.
Looking
into the past, today's seniors and even
our later-middle-age group grew up in different times
than we all currently live in. The differences between
those days and modern times are simply huge. Values,
beliefs, and social attitudes have drastically changed,
and so have many of our attitudes towards sex and
sexuality.
For
example, women who grew up pre-1950 are totally
familiar with the effects of sexual discrimination.
Where some of these women made it through the
social barriers, there were still professional
and even
legal barriers that discriminated against them.
These
early experiences had a lasting impact on how this
generation viewed sex, what they got out
of sex, and even what they used sex for. Younger
generations have grown up with a different set
of messages, and will definitely affect their attitudes
towards sex differently as they age.
Basically,
there are more than just physical changes that
affect sex as we age. The social and psychological
influences in our lives also affect the quality of
sex as we age, as do our relationships. Marriages
and committed relationships also change our outlook
on sex. The good news is that we are programmed to
keep performing well into our later years, if at
a slower rate than before. The secret is in keeping
healthy and active.
Use
if or lose it – sexual maintenance
It's
the same with sex as it is with anything else,
if you don't use it, you'll lose it. The big key
to maintaining your sexual performance is just
like physical fitness of any other kind, repeat
your performance
regularly, and your body responds by keeping you
fit for the task. So the best way to maintain your
sexual capacity as you age is to just keep having
sex!
Easier
said than done, you say? Not really, when you consider
all the help that's available through
both modern medical science and from what we know
about the psychology of sex. What if your partner
is unavailable? Self-stimulation (masturbation) is
common and poses no health risks or side effects.
A
couple of other considerations should include appropriate
positions, adequate use of foreplay,
medications, and permanent medical conditions.
Appropriate
positions
Conditions
like early arthritis are a reality for many folks,
even in their middle years. If physical
discomfort is an issue for you, consider looking
into different sexual positions that may improve
the situation. A little research in this area can
be very fruitful, especially when you can discover
a new position that satisfies both partners while
still being comfortable for both. Here's a quick
tip: try putting pillows or cushions under the
hips…
Adequate foreplay
Issues
like vaginal dryness can make many women partners
unresponsive, even when they wish otherwise.
By spending a little more time on foreplay many of
these issues can be passed by. Using lubes or creams
can increase lubrication, making sexual contact more
welcome, and even more exciting, as the application
of these products can act as a form of foreplay all
on its own. Some of these have been specifically
formulated with herbal sexual stimulant formulas
added in (products such as Vigorelle) which can add
even further dimensions.
Medications
Many medications can have a negative effect on testosterone
production, which can drastically reduce men's sex
drive and penile performance regardless of age. Other
medications can also affect sexual performance and
libido. Although drugs like Viagra have been created
to help with erectile dysfunction, many heart and
blood-pressure medications (like nitroglycerine)
interact very badly with drugs like Viagra, even
resulting in heart attack in some cases. To avoid
problems, look to alternatives like asking your physician
to prescribe a different class of medication, or
look into herbal treatments like VigRX that have
few (if any) side effects and are safe to use with
most heart medications.
Permanent
medical conditions The effects of physical alterations
due to illness
or surgeries (e.g. colostomies, mastectomies, etc.)
can affect sexual performance. In these cases communication
with your partner becomes important to help remove
feelings of guilt, embarrassment, or fear, which
can often have further reaching effects than the
procedures themselves.
To
sum it up, there are differences in how we approach
sex and how we engage in sex as we age, but there
are also benefits. Experience and education can get
us much more out of our later sexual experiences,
and as long as we're physically careful, and tend
to our sexual health, partners can continue to have
satisfying sex well into their senior years. Click
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